I am in love. Not with a person, but with a song. An absolutely mindblowingly beautiful song. And it's a cover. The original is made by Troye Sivan and it's stunning, but it never really made me feel anything. I thought it was a beautiful song but I never really loved it. Then, I stumbled across a cover of it and fell. Hard. The cover is made by two Korean singers from the band BTS and honestly, their cover blew me away. They uploaded it to their Soundcloud and I was stunned. Their first language is Korean, and not English, yet the English is so flawless in the cover. They've put so much effort into the song and it's absolutely beautiful. I am just in awe of how great they are. Jungkook and Rap Monster both have incredible vocals and this is just a really really great cover. Please listen to it and tell me what you think!



Y'all know I'm a massive musiclover, and I absolutely l o v e finding new music. Recently, I've gotten more and more into kpop and I'm gonna write a blog post about that some day. I just thought I'd show you what's spinning around in my headphones these days. 9 tracks, all very very different.

(ps! click the x after the title to get to the youtube video and to hear the track!)

BTS - Run // x

I listen to this song every single day. BTS are a Korean group that I have spent about 3 weeks listening to on repeat. I'm not even kidding. I just love their music so much. They're great dancers and singers and their music videos are amazing. But more on that in another post... This song is absolutely amazing. Just check it out, even if you're not into kpop. It's so good.

Young Rising Sons - Fucked Up // x

This song is SO good. A girl I follow on twitter got me into these guys and I absolutely adore their music. This song makes me happy and it's a proper amazing pop tune. It's got some great vocals and the music is just really great. I've told literally all my friends about this song. Look it up!

EXO - Lightsaber // x

Yep, it's actually called Lightsaber. It's also Korean and fucking AMAZING. Exo are an absolutely amazing group of guys who can do no wrong in my eyes. Lightsaber is a collaboration with Star Wars (obviously) and it's such a great song. The video is only about 2 minutes, but the song is 4. If you like the video, look it up on spotify!

MAX - Wrong // x

I love Max. I've loved him since I saw his covers on youtube and I was so happy when he was signed by DCD2 Records (which is owned by Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy). Max Schneider has such an incredible voice and I listened to his song Gibberish all summer long. Wrong is a killer track and please check it out and support this incredible guy!

The Maine - As Long As You Love Me // x

The Maine is honestly one of my all time favourite pop-punk bands. They have such amazing lyrics and they are just the best. However, this song is a cover! Yes! It's a Backstreet Boys song and the Maine has made it into their own. It's different from the original and it's got such a chilled out vibe. I love it!

G-Eazy - Me, Myself & I // x

Honestly, who doesn't love this song? It's incredible. That's all I'm gonna say. You've probably already heard it.

Panic! At The Disco - Emperor's New Clothes // x

Honestly I haven't listened to Panic! At the Disco in so many years, but then I happened to hear this song and was like... whoa. This is so good. I love Brendon's voice and this song has got some killer music in it.

Hailee Steinfeld - You're Such A // x

This is just a really good pop song. It's so catchy and I love Hailee's voice and the lyrics are fun. It's just a great song!

Troye Sivan - Fools // x

I was a bit late to the Troye hype and I do enjoy his album, but this is probably the only song I listen to on a weekly basis. A band I love has made a cover of this which was absolutely astonishing, but Troye's original will always be the best.

"They say life is a battlefield..
I say bring it on"

What I feel mostly in my life is that I've been doing this for the wrong reason. I keep worrying about other people's feeling and thoughts, and I don't really focus on mine. I've become so aware of everyone elses opinion that my own doesn't seem to matter anymore. I've lived life the way people want me to. Honestly, this is such a common thing. Society is full of adverts telling us how to dress, how to act, how to look. There's a shitload of propaganda out there telling girls how to act and look so that boys will approve of it and fall in love with them. Honestly, isn't that so dumb? We shouldn't have to feel like we dress or look the way we do for someone's approval. We should dress for ourselves. Fuck the others. I talk a good game, but I've been one of those people. Thinking that oh, if I dress this way maybe I'll seem more appealing, maybe people will like me. What good has that done? None. I've been through a lot of shit in my life, I've fought a lot of battles. Mostly with my own head. My brain has a tendency to make me feel absolutely horrendous. No one can make me feel as worthless and useless as my brain can. I'm an expert at being mean to myself. Honestly, I'm my own bully. I think most people have a tendency to be very critical of themselves. We long to fit in, long to have friends and connect with people that we are willing to do anything. I've spent so much time in my life wondering why people don't like me. Is it the way I dress? Is it my personality? Am I too fat? Too loud? Am I just... not good enough? My brain's answer to all these questions: Yes. Yes that it, that's what wrong with you. And honestly, it's all lies. There's absolutely nothing wrong with me. And not with you. And not with anyone else. We are all bloody perfect the way we are. We just need to realize that.


It's not easy coming to terms with who you are and accepting yourself. I should know. I'm still not 100% sure that I like myself. I mean, some days I do. Some days I don't. I guess that's life. But if I think back to how I was a year ago... Damn son, I've changed a lot. For the better! And I shall continue to do so. I spent the majority of last year doing things I thought was the right thing. Maybe they were, back then. I saw bands I really liked, I travelled to places I enjoy and where I have friends living. But at some point, I stopped enjoying it. Maybe something changed. Maybe I did? When I went to London in August, I had a blast. I saw some really great bands live, but it also made me feel... full. Sometimes when you see band live countless of times, and they play the same setlist every time.. It gets boring. You know what to expect. It's the same show. That's what happened. I wasn't surprised anymore, I wasn't ecstatic about their music. That trip was overall a great time, and I had so much fun with my friends. So much fun, that I decided to go back in November. But that wasn't as fun. The first day, I was so happy. I love London, I really do, and I love walking around it and just being there. But as the days went by, I started to feel a bit uneasy. I wasn't happy. I just felt like I was wasting time and money. I could've been home, at work and saving money for my trip to Thailand. Instead I was in London buying clothes I didn't need. I saw my friends, and I love them very much, but we are very different. There's about 4 of them I count as close friends, the others are basically now just acquaintances. We used to have so much in common, now there's nothing. I think you know when a friendship is starting to end, when planning to meet up is such a hassle that you start to think you don't even want to meet up at all. Sometimes you grow apart. You lead different lives and things change, it's honestly very natural. I've always been a girl with few friends, and most of them have always lived in other cities or countries. I honestly do love long distance friendships and it's great to have friends all over the world. You don't need to speak every single day, but honestly if I don't speak to someone for a month... It's not working. I think during that trip to London I realized that I wasn't there because I wanted to. I was there because it was kinda expected of me to go there. My friends wanted me to visit. So I did. But did I 100% want to? I don't know. I was excited to go there, absolutely, but it wasn't the same giddy feeling I've felt before. I missed home a lot as well, something I rarely do while there. I missed my family and my friends here. I actually even missed my job. It wasn't fun. I think that was my turning point in life. I needed to change. For the better. Again.


I'm 100% sure I have lived way too many parts of my life doing things for others. I've worried way too much about what others will think and say. Like, fuck them! This is my life and it's a short one. I have to do what I want. I've always been fairly good at dressing how I want to, but people always have an opinion about it. Since I'm not the skinniest gal around, people normally use the "aren't you too big to wear that?" and "it looks a bit vulgar". Y'all, I'm just wearing a low cut top, not walking around in my underwear. It's like, because I have curves people seem to think it's okay to have opinions about what I wear. It's not, honestly. It's like, if one of my friends who's skinny would wear a bodysuit and a pair of denim shorts people would praise that outfit and say that it looks really nice. When I wear that, people say I'm too fat and that it's vulgar. It's too sexualised. That ain't my problem though? That's society's problem. I should be able to wear whatever I want without being seen as some kind of sex-object? Like, please. Curves are seen as so vulgar and sexy and it's so wrong. Like, this is my body and it's not for your use. Stop sexualising my outfits. I wear the clothes I wear for my sake. I like them, I feel comfortable in them. I don't give a fuck if I guy likes it? Like, hell. I dress for me! The issue is with you, not me. I didn't use to think like this though, not up until the middle of last year. I was (and still is) very insecure. I have the world self-confidence and I honestly struggle to find things I am good at. I don't like complimenting myself. But I've started to try and change my way of thinking. I am so damn great at my job. I'm great at writing. I'm really funny and I have a massive heart and I care about people so much. I'm loving and kind. And on some days, I look really fucking great. I'm a bloody catch. This isn't easy to get into my head though. Some days, I feel like I'm a ten and that I can do absolutely anything. Then, some days I feel like I'm the ugliest human being ever and I hide at home watching tv shows and binge eating. No one's perfect, to be honest. Actually, there's no such thing as perfect. We are all our own types of perfect. Like, I'm perfect in my own ways.


Nothing good can ever come out of doing things for other people's approval. Do things for you. Don't do what everybody else thinks you should. Do what you want, not what they want. You go being amazing and follow YOUR dreams. Don't follow someone else's. Find your passion, and go for it. Don't let someone else tell you what's right for you, only you know that. It's taken me so many years to figure out who I am, and what I want, and it's not easy. But it's great when you do find out. I only made one new years resolution for 2016, and it sounds like a real simple one but it's actually hard. "Do things for you, not for others". Basically, like I've said I've been an expert in doing things others think I should. I've been doing stuff for their happiness, not for mine. I've been really bad at doing things that make me happy. I've been neglecting my own happiness and putting others before me. It's not a bad thing to sometimes put other people's happiness before you own, but don't do it all the time. Because sometimes, they don't actually prioritize your  happiness and that will make you feel absolutely horrible. Friendships are all about giving and taking. If you feel like all your friend does is take, and that you get 0 back... It's not a good friendship. Focus on your happiness and what you want to do. Don't put up with people walking all over you and treating you like crap. You're a star, don't let people treat you like you're dirt. That's also something I have to work on this year, because I am an expert at letting others walk all over me. I don't like confrontation, but I have to work on that. This is the year where I won't take any bullshit. This is my year.

Life is full of regrets. There's big regrets and there's small regrets. But however big or small, they always seem to mess with our heads. We can regret buying a shirt on a shopping spree, whether it was £10 or £80. We can regret big decisions, such as picking the right education. Some choices should definitely be thought through completely, but nonetheless big or small - it can always lead to regrets.

I've spent my life regretting things. I quit university because I was convinced I was in the wrong line of education. And I was correct. Before quitting, I spent months having panic attacks about quitting and what it would lead to. I was worried that I was making the wrong choice and that I would regret it. But I haven't. Not for a single second. And now I'm in college again, studying something that I really enjoy. And I don't think I would've figured it out if I hadn't quit the other course. 

But there's always gonna be regrets. Life's full of them. It will always be full of regrets. And that's good, to be honest. I mean, if you're thinking about making a big change to your life, you should always be worried about consequences. But not too worried. Because being worried can make you go absolutely insane. Trust me, I know. 

I've decided to stop living my life regretting things I've done. I mean what's the point? If you've done something, be happy you did it. But if you have to regret something, regret what you did do. Not what you didn't do. If you regret stuff you didn't do, then you're gonna spend the rest of your life in agony. Wondering what could have happened if things had gone differently, if your life had been different then. I've been there and it's ridiculously painful to constantly wonder what could have been. It's better to regret what you did. I mean, at least then you'll have something nice to remember. Because like my title said, at one point it was exactly what you wanted. 

So what I want to say in this mess of a post is, never regret what you did. Or didn't do. Don't regret anything. Never regret sleeping with someone who's name you can't remember (we've all been there). Never regret buying something that you really wanted, even if it meant you had to live on noodles for the rest of the month. Never regret drinking too much at a night out, if you had fun doing so. Never regret the pictures of your drunken self that your friend uploads, because it's a memory for life. Never regret being with someone who made you really happy at the time, but who's now not in your life anymore. Who cares if they made you sad for a while, if they at one point made you really happy? Treasure that. Treasure the happy moments. 

Hiya!

Hope y'all are well. I'm currently doing a night shift at work and it's v boring because there's literally nothing to do. So I thought "what can I possibly do so I'm less bored?" and then it hit me: BLOG. Yeah so I'm back for good now! Y'all ain't getting rid of me. Album review is coming up now, and it was on my "most anticipated albums of 2015" list and it's Fifth Harmony's debut album Reflection (Deluxe Edition)! I won't do a track by track review but yeah, let's go!

I've always been a fan of girlbands. Ever since I heard Spice Girls for the first time as a kid I was hooked. Me and my friends used to dance to Spice Girls and pretend we were different members. I was always Geri - not entirely sure why. I just thought she was SO cool. Then came my love for TLC, then Destiny's Child, then Sugababes and Girls Aloud. And then I found Little Mix and absolutely loved them. And then I remember seeing Fifth Harmony all over twitter and tumblr and honestly, at first I wasn't that impressed. I had enough bands in my life and figured I didn't need to pay attention to them. I was a Little Mix fan and thought one girlband was enough. However, I loved Miss Movin' On when it came out. But that was it. Then I didn't really care until Fifth Harmony released BO$$. There was just something about that song that I really loved. It was catchy and had some hilarious lyrics. And then I heard Sledgehammer and I was floored. Slowly but surely, I was becoming a Fifth Harmony fan.

When the album was released, I tried to be skeptical about it. I found my favourite songs immediately and then kinda didn't care about the other. Until I listened to the album from start to end and realised that it was one heck of an album. As I'm looking at the tracklist I can honestly say that there's no song I don't like. Sure there are tracks I don't love as much as the others, but there's no bad song. Not one.

My first favourite was Sledgehammer, because it's just an incredible song. Then, I adored Brave Honest Beautiful because of the lyrics but also the amazing intro which is a nod to Destiny's Child's Bootylicious intro. I honestly didn't care for Everlasting Love, Like Mariah or Suga Mama at first, but they've grown on me. The girls show off some insane vocals in those three songs and I am genuinely so impressed by their vocals. The girls have so much talent between them.

There's a lot of variety on the album. There's tracks for everything. You wanna get a confidence boost? Listen to Reflection or Brave Honest Beautiful. You wanna dance your ass off? Body Rock or This is How We Roll. You're mad at some boy who's done you wrong? We Know.

If I had to choose my favourite songs, it'd had to be Top Down, Going Nowhere and Brave Honest Beautiful. But literally every song on the album is incredible and I'm so amazed by these five girls. They've grown so much on me and I can't help but love their music. What a kick ass album. Every other girlband out there - take notes. This is how a real pop album should sound.

There's pop songs, there's influences from R'n'B and hip-hop, there's ballads and there's party anthems and girl power anthems. There's also some collaborations, with a guest apparence from Tyga on Like Mariah, Kid Ink on Worth It and Meghan Trainor on Brave Honest Beautiful. Brave Honest Beautiful has some of the best lyrics on the album, including "don't go and waste your precious time with all the nonsense on your mind, no don't criticize yourself no more, you got a smile worth fighting for".


Spotify. Itunes.

How many tracks: 14, it's the deluxe one. Without the three bonus tracks, it's 11.

Bonus tracks: Body Rock, Going Nowhere, Brave Honest Beautiful.

Best lyric: "maybe you should just stay in your lane" - we know. purely, because it's so sassy.

Weirdest lyric: "We makin' it clap, we don't need hands for that." - this is how we roll

Hearts out of five: 5

I reckon 2015 is gonna be a very good year for music. We've already had a brilliant album from Fall Out Boy and a debut album from Meghan Trainor, as well as Mark Ronson's fourth studio album. There's definitely some releases this year that I cannot wait for. I thought I'd write them down. 

I for one, cannot wait for Pierce The Veil to finally drop a new album. Their last album came out 2012 and it's still one of my favourite albums, but I'm dying to hear some new music. I'm so excited to hear what they've been working on! There's no actual release date - or album name - so I guess I'll just have to wait and see. 

Fifth Harmony - Reflection (February 3rd)

Yeah, this is a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. I love a good girl band and while I wasn't a massive fan of Fifth Harmony's first EP, except for Miss Movin' On, I am very excited for this album. BO$$ is amazing, despite the ricidulous spelling. Them Girls be Like is my jam. And they dropped a new audio on youtube a few days ago, for a song called Worth It (feat. Kid Ink) and it's so damn good. Actually really excited to hear the entire album!

Imagine Dragons - Smoke + Mirrors (February 17th)

I loved Imagine Dragons first album. I was actually obsessed with it and I love everything about this band's music. Their lyrics and music is always so killer, and the vocals are outstanding. They've dropped two singles so far, Gold and I Bet My Life. Gold is just wow. Go listen to it right now. Then be impressed.

Marina and The Diamonds - Froot (April 3rd)

Froot is Marina's third album and I've loved both her albums previous to it and I've very excited to see what Froot sounds like. I can't say I'm overly impressed with the songs I've heard so far. There's no denying that Marina's voice is amazing, but I'm not 100% sure I'm gonna love the new album.

The Wombats - Glitterbug (April 6th)

As a teenager, I loved the Wombats. I loved their first album, and probably listened to it more than what was acceptable. Their second album was alright with some incredible song, but not like the first. Now, four years later, they're finally back. And holy shit, they are still incredible. They dropped the first single, Greek Tragedy, a while ago. The video is really weird but the song is amazing. Go listen to it asap, you won't regret it.

All Time Low - Future Hearts (April 7th)

I've been a fan of All Time Low for years, since they released The Party Scene in 2005. I've loved every album they've released, until they released Don't Panic. I didn't hate it, I just didn't love it. I thought some songs were good but overall I was bored by it. I've heard their new song Something's Gotta Give a few times and I do actually love it, so I'm very excited to hear the rest of the album!

There's rumours that Iggy Azalea will drop a new album this year and hey, here's to hoping. I love her and desperately need some new Iggy tracks in my life.

The most anticipated album for me would be a new one from Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. I live for The Heist and I want new music from them so badly. Hopefully 2015 is the year they drop a new album!

What albums are you guys looking forward to this year? 

Fall Out Boy - American Beauty/American Psycho

I don't think anyone who knows me have been able to miss the fact that I am a massive Fall Out Boy fan. I'd say they are one of my top 5 favourite bands, ever. I'm very rarely disappointed by their music, but there's some albums in their past that I haven't been completely in love with. (Pax Am Days, anyone?) Their new album dropped a few days ago and I have already listened through it a bunch of times. Verdict? Stunning. 

A lot of people are saying that Fall Out Boy have changed a lot, and maybe they have. It's natural though, for a band to change as they grow older. They progress, and find inspiration in other places. Their style might change. I think Fall Out Boy is one of those bands who have only changed for the better. I was obsessed with Take This to Your Grave and From Under The Cork Tree when I was a teenager and they were on repeat most days. I l o v e d Infinity on High - even though a lot of people hated it. I found Folie A Deux to be one of those albums that I don't like at the first listen, but then it grows on you. And Save Rock and Roll - my favourite album from 2013 - was an instant favourite. But what about American Beauty / American Psycho?

Since Save Rock and Roll was such a hit with me, I had insanely high expectations when they announced the new album. I loved Centuries at the first listen, but I was very skeptic when I heard American Beauty/American Psycho (the song). It was so different and weird. But it grew on me. And then there was Immortals, which I absolutely adored. Those three songs are a great example about how much variety the album holds. Centuries has an arena-rock vibe to it, while American Beauty/American Psycho has clear influences from the late 70's mixed with pop. And Immortals? It's like a slow rock song with pop influences that gets stuck in your head for days.

I hate albums where all songs sound the same, and I don't think Fall Out Boy have ever had one of those albums. American Beauty/American Psycho is definitely an album full of variety. You have The Kids Are Alright, which is a bit more mellow - as well as Jet Pack Blues and Favorite Record. There's so many good songs and I am once again amazed by this band. Patrick's vocals seems to be getting better and better and he's showing more ranges than ever. The songwriting is absolutely excellent. Both the music, vocals and lyrics on this album are out of this world. 

For me, there's always some songs I find myself absolutely obsessed with on an album. On this album, it's hard to choose. There's Uma Thurman - a song I literally can't get out of my head for days. It's so catchy and there's some incredible guitar and bass parts that I'm obsessed with. There's Favorite Record, a beautiful and kinda mellow song about being very in love with someone. There's Irresistible, where Patrick utters some French words and it's an absolutely incredible song.

All in all, it's an incredible album and I'm pretty sure this band can never fail. Will it be the best album I hear this year? I don't know. Maybe. We'll see in December.

Stand out songs: Favorite Record. Uma Thurman. Irresistible. Novocaine. Immortals.

Score: 5 outta 5.